As I started writing this post I began to dwell on all the things that were problematic with our old place and how disappointed we were that it wasn't the family dream home we had wanted. We had such high hopes for our beautiful historic home. We thought we would see Ezra walk on those original hardwood floors, celebrate many Christmases in that living room, grow our lives in the comfort of those walls. I so wanted this to be the right space for our family and was so sad that it just wasn't.
There was so much hope there, but now looking back I feel silly for being so upset about the way everything played out. Yeah, there were some serious, frustrating problems and we really struggled to try to make something fit that just wasn't right and now it's behind us. I don't want the negativity of that experience to color my life anymore. This morning I finished packing the smallest of left behinds, cleaned the place from top to bottom, handed over the keys...and moved on.
New hopes and such.
On that note, I couldn't be happier with our decision to move and our kick ass new place. I can already tell that it is much better suited to our new family, our new life. I see us being here for quite some time and I am absolutely in love with the idea of Ez growing up in this space, but now I am thinking what I've always known... it's just a place. We will be a family no matter where we lay our heads at night.
We are settling in, unpacking boxes, figuring out the math of readjustment.
I hope that within these new walls we continue to grow as a family. I hope that the calm that I feel in this new space stays with me. I hope that I can allow this change of scenery to facilitate a positive change in me. Mostly I hope that I can better see what I have and appreciate it in the way it deserves.
Namaste.
Tara
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