This weekend was amazing. We spent a great night out with friends as my mom watched the little man. Spending most of the time talking about our babes at home, sharing the beauty and the struggles, it was reaffirming and invigorating. Having an adult conversation and a couple of drinks was so lovely and exactly what I needed. It can be so easy to get completely wrapped up in all that is having a newborn and to step away for just a moment did a world of good. As we drove home I couldn't wait to get back to Ezra, to hold him close and gaze at his beautiful little face.
The rest of the weekend was spent lounging with my boys, really relaxing together as a family for the first time since Ez's birth. We all needed a good couple of days to just lay in bed, cuddle, and watch bad tv. Saturday Ezra turned one month old and we all celebrated with lots of kisses and naps. There is something inherently wonderful about lazy weekends. Now we just lounge plus one.
Sometimes you need to get out to feel satisfied, understood, heard and sometimes all you need is the comfort of your own bed and the people that you love.
Getting into the groove of motherhood is still very much a work in progress and we have good days and more difficult ones, but a balance is forming. Every day I am healing and feeling more capable. Every day we are all learning more about what one another needs, learning how to become a family.
I feel as though with the intensity of so much new entering my life I have been holding my breath for the last month and this weekend was a big exhale.