Today was my first day back to work at the museum. Ah! I can't believe it has already been 6 weeks! I am returning slowly beginning with only a few hours one day a week. Once I am fully back into the swing of things I will still only be working part-time as it is very important to Kellen and I that one of us is always with Ezra during the week. Childcare is extremely cost prohibitive and we are fortunate enough financially that I will be able to stay home with him the majority of the time.
I love, love, love my job and it was so rewarding to be back in that environment. Getting out of the house and doing something I really enjoy and making a little bit of extra money is really good for me right now and wearing clothes that weren't pajamas (no matter how cute they are) was a welcome change of pace. I am learning that it is very easy to become isolated in new motherhood and just this little bit of time away is definitely going to help prevent too much removal from the outside world.
I definitely missed my little man, but I was back so quickly (less than 3 hours) I think he barely noticed my absence. I was also very happy that I was swamped with work, making the time go by super duper quickly. It was hectic, but definitely a blessing to my emotions. By the time my heart began to really ache for him I was in the car driving the less than 5 miles back to our home.
I never really saw myself as the "stay at home" type, but now that he is here that is exactly where I want to be. This is the time to really cultivate the beginnings of my relationship with my child and I am incredibly lucky to have the time and monetary stability to do that. With that being said I am still an individual with my own passions and curiosities. I still need time away from the home to pursue the other things that color my life with fulfillment. Like most things, it's not all or nothing and I look forward to finding the balance between work and home.
"Be moderate in order to taste the joys of life in abundance."
-Epicurus
Namaste!
Tara
4 comments:
Hey Tara! Edy here. :) I LOVE this! I'm glad you love your job AND that you are excited about staying home with Ezra most of the time. I think you and Kellen are totally on the right track with the always being one parent with the babe theory. I am blessed to be able to do so with Em (and L, though she started Kindergarten on Tues)and have also really come to enjoy and love being a mama. I like, get on 'mommy' websites and read articles and blogs (Babble.com has become a new favorite website) and buy sweet little things off Etsy, while scanning for fun ideas I can do myself.. it feels good to be so important and loved by little souls! And it'll keep getting better! Wait until his personality starts blooming!! Ahh! So excited for you <3
@ Edy- Babble.com was a constant read during my pregnancy. I find a lot of comfort and inspiration reading about the experiences of others so I am a big fan "mommy blogs" and the like. I have made an official rule for myself that I am not allowed to look at Etsy until he is a little bit older as I know I would be tempted to buy so much! Ha!
I am so happy that you are doing well. You deserve it, Edy. You are a really wonderful lady and it is great to hear that you are happy and lovin' being a mama!
So glad your first day back was a success! I think if there's one thing that all of us—parents or not—crave more of in life it's balance. It's definitely an on-going project for me. When I don't feel fulfilled personally, it's very hard to be the kind of parent I want to be!
~ Noelle
@Noelle- I definitely agree. I am learning that I am my best mama self when I am fulfilled in other aspects of my life. It's just all about striking that balance in which all sides are fueling and invigorating one another, not taking away from. Let the tightrope walk BEGIN!
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